Like a scene from some Hollywood thriller, a team of U.S.  Marshals stormed a warehouse in Irvington, New Jersey, last summer to intercept a shipment of evildoers from Pakistan. The reason you probably haven’t heard about the raid is that the objective was not to seize Al Qaeda operatives or white slavers, but $80,000 worth of basmati rice contaminated with weevils, beetles, and insect larvae, making it unfit for human consumption. In regulation-speak, the food was “adulterated,” because “it consists in whole or in part of any filthy, putrid, or decomposed substance, or if it is otherwise unfit for food.”

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