The Gore Report: Leo the Lip; Neglected Tuna; Altoids, Anyone?

Lock Up the Gore Girls! Leonardo DiCaprio came out of the political closet last month and announced he is a passionate supporter of Al Gore. He told Time magazine that he was even thinking about joining the Gore campaign. Perhaps he would do well as an environmental advisor. Mr. "No Controlling Legal Authority" no doubt could use advice from a young heartthrob with ideas such as these: "I shouldn’t be eating hamburgers, because the methane gas cows release is the No.1 contributor to the destruction of the ozone layer; and the No. 1 reason they destroy the rainforest is to make grazing ground for cattle. So it’s very ironic that I eat beef, being the environmentalist that I am. But then again, if I ordered the tuna sandwich, I would be promoting the fact that they have large tuna nets that capture innocent little dolphins."

Hey, Leo, One More Thing! Now that he’s brought it up, perhaps Leo can clear up a little question that has puzzled us for some time. While we are touched by the sincerity of animal rights activists who have such problems with dolphins’ getting caught in nets designed to catch tuna, we have often wondered about the selective compassion. After all, what about the tuna?

Breath Mint, Anyone? Is life on the campaign trail beginning to frazzle the normally cool Veep? The Washington Post reported some odd behavior recently from Al. "Reporters have been complaining about Gore’s lack of accessibility, to no avail. After one such request, the vice president sent a couple of reporters a note with two Altoids mints enclosed (significance unclear). When protesters heckled Gore in Oakland, he agreed to meet with them, saying, ‘Let’s hear it for the First Amendment’–but refused to allow a reporter to sit in."